The Art of Failure

What do we fear when we get up in front of an audience? Making a fool of ourselves, embarrassing ourselves, being heckled, having rotten tomatoes thrown at our feet, losing our clothes, the list goes on and on. Sometimes the list is completely irrational, but audiences are not always as generous as we would like them to be.

This past weekend, my sister-in-law turned forty and for the event my husband, her brother, helped to organize a wonderful surprise party. Now despite the fact that he runs a busy photography business, helps care for our two year old son, plays hockey and did two years worth of taxes he also thought he could manage creating a slide show telling the story of his sister's life, organize the caterers and fly a friend in from Utah for the event. All of this he miraculously accomplished in a little over a week's time. Several hours before the event; however, he had a brainstorm, he would also give an entertaining and informative speech! As he hung decorations, let the caterers in, and secured a babysitter he was searching the internet for quirky facts about the year his sister was born and managed to compose a few words in his head. Jump ahead a few hours, the party is in full swing, the candles are lit, the gorgeous creme fraiche and smoked salmon pancakes are being gobbled up and my husband begins the entertainment.

He has a vibrant, energetic and engaging personality and loves being in front of a crowd; unfortunately, he runs into a speaker's most dreaded foe, a tough audience. A few wise-cracking friends attempt to cut his speech short and when I see his face turning a burnt red against his lovely white linen shirt my heart breaks and I want nothing more than to alleviate the embarrassment he is experiencing at the moment.

Fortunately, he handles "failure" better than I. The next day we go for a long walk and he tells me about all the discoveries he made. "It always looks so easy when people get up to give great speeches. I guess I should have actually practiced and kept it brief, focussing more on my sister or possibly even allowing for some participation from the audience."

I had told him the story of Bill Clinton getting booed off of the stage at the 1988 Democratic Convention. My husband decided that he will do his best to emulate Bill Clinton's ability to learn from past mistakes. My fortieth is coming up and I have no doubts that he will have perfected it by then!!!